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Showing posts from June, 2013

SJP-- Anger and Communication

How does your owner expect you to communicate when you are angry/upset?  http://prompts.submissiveguide.com/85 This is actually kind of funny in our way. My Owner knows I will tell him exactly what I'm thinking at any given time, which in turn cheeses him off. So me being cheesed off is never a good thing, as I have a habit of opening my mouth at all the wrong times. (I'd give a really good example of this, but it happens so often that it's not even funny.) I wish that I could watch my mouth a little better, or filter it somehow, but then people wouldn't know what I was thinking. I don't express my feelings very well. The best I can say is that my Owner expects me to be... I dunno. Calm and collected, at least. -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 24

Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter) This seems like it would take a long time to come up with. I have a ton of music, but no one to write to, I think. I could always write to myself, but what's the point of that. This is a totally useless post. -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 23

Something you wish you had done in your life: Had done or want to do, maybe. There are a ton of things that I want to do. I want to go to another country someday, one of the more civilized countries of course, and visit and learn different things while I'm there. Maybe take the time to be a tourist or something. That would be interesting. I don't know. Nothing special. -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 22

Something you wish you hadn't done in your life: Um... I really don't think this applies to me. I don't really have anything that I regret or wish I hadn't done. Well, wait. I have things that I wish went -smoother- in my life, like the time I lived with roommates. I wish I would have been a bit nicer to them and taken myself to therapy sooner. I wish that my old roommates and I were as close as we used to be before we were roommates. I think that it kind of ruined how we are now with each other. Oh well. Can't change it now, and I DID learn from it, so I figure it needed to happen. -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 21

(scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?  I don't even have to think about this. I would immediately go and try to find my friend. I would do my best to help them, even if I had to fight off the firefighters and police or whatever. An argument is no reason to not do something nice for you friend, no matter how bad it was. If you are friends, you are friend, and you WILL help them. That's just how it is. You don't have to be petty about things. I would do just about anything for all of my friends. Maybe I'm just weird, but I love them all. -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 20

Your views on drugs and alchohol: Well, I have varying views of things. I think that certain things, like marijuana, are okay for cancer patients and patients that have issues. Other than that, if you don't need it... You don't need it. It's pretty simple. In the lifestyle, I would think that it would be detrimental to your session or scene. You wouldn't know when you were truly done or not and would have a slower reaction time. I believe that things like that should be avoided. I really don't like drugs. I'm okay with alcohol, but only in social settings where you aren't doing anything trying and you don't plan to. It's also good if you drink responsibly (I am known for only have one or two drinks if at all) and to make sure you have a designated driver and all that good stuff. I want more people to be responsible, instead of childish assholes. -Harvest

SJP-- Routines

Do you have a routine for any tasks? http://prompts.submissiveguide.com/286 To be honest, I don't have a lot of routines yet. I have a notebook that I created based on the Control Book from FlyLady, but it has my Lifestyle things in there as well. (So I guess it really is a control book! lol) Anyway, in my Control Book are lists of things that I have to do each day, depending on the day and depending on what needs to be done. There are special lists for each room, and tips for how to do things and make it nice and clutter-free. (Unfortunately, I'm a pack-rat, so things don't get thrown away very often, just shifted around. But I'm working on this.) I really suggest doing this for someone who doesn't know how to get clean around the house and things without help. For a great place to start on your own control book, visit FlyLady @ http://flylady.net/ -harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 19

What do you think of religion? Or What do you think of politics? So I'm pagan. Pretty much you've probably gathered that since I have posted about it several times. I believe in equality in just about everything. I don't think that I have that many views on it besides that. Politics? I hate politics. I have a hard time keeping up with them because they are ever-changing and very difficult to follow, whereas my attention span is really very short.

SJP-- Honesty Is the Best Policy

Do you believe that owners owe their charges honesty? Are the slaves entitled to full disclosure of everything regarding their owner? http://prompts.submissiveguide.com/406 Just like the title of this prompt-inspired blog, I believe that honesty is the best policy. I see no point in little white lies, even if they make someone happy or smooth things over for you. If you want them to really know what's going on and how they can improve, you will tell them in a sincere manner that allows them to grow. This is usually called constructive criticism. I have been known to be a right bastard though when it comes to being honest. It's against my personal ethics to lie, so I will gladly tell you the truth about things. I'm a bit blunt I guess. I believe that Tops should be honest with their bottoms and vice versa. We cannot communicate fully if we do not communicate honestly and openly with each other. People, if your bottom isn't doing something that you want, you should

30 Days of Truth-- Day 18

Your views on Gay Marraige: Let them marry! It's not my business to tell anyone what they can or cannot do. I'd be on some kind of power trip or something if I was. Everyone is equal. It's stupid to think otherwise. You're not better than anyone else, you're just some jackass that thinks they need to take over everything and make people unhappy. Not in the bible? Who gives a fuck! Not all of us are christian, thankyouverymuch. I don't give a shit what you say about this country being founded on christian beliefs, I still think we need to look at the masons more carefully. I myself, am pagan and I'm proud of it. Pagans are proud to be pro-equality, and so am I. I could bitch FOREVER about this, but I'll spare you. -harvest

30 Days of Truth- Day 17

Name a book you read that changed your views on something: Well, I honestly couldn't tell you that. I have read so many books in my lifetime most people would not know what to do. I go to the library every week and check out about thirty books... then I finish them by the next week. I read A LOT. So naming books that changed my views would be difficult. I would like to take this post to mention that there are many blogs I read and keep up with that change my life. I appreciate those blogs as if they were books that are being written almost daily. You can find those blogs in my profile if you want to know more about what sort of things I like to read. I try to stay up on things. These blogs are legendary in my opinion. They are worth reading, and taking the time to get into it. Thank you, all of you, for reading my ramblings and enjoying them. It means a lot to me. -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 16

Something or Someone you could live without: I think I could live without a few things, but I don't think I would allow myself to. I don't know. I really don't have an answer for this question. And now back to your regularly schedule programs.

30 Days of Truth-- Day 15

Something or someone you can't live without because you've tried living without: I think that would be a someone, and that would be my Owner. I can't live without him. The world that the two of us have created for ourselves is a little mixed up, but we have each other and that is what matters. I went two weeks without him (though I did occasionally see him briefly or call him) and that was painful for me. I was surprised that I could do it when the time was up. Batty-batsz, I will always love you dearly and hold you close to my heart. -Harvest <3's Batsz

30 Days of Truth-- Day 14

A hero that has let you down: Well, I don't really have heroes. I seem to see myself as my own hero. I want to be the best person I can be, but I have not seen someone that I really look up to. I mean, yeah there is a lot of other submissives and dominants that I look up to in the forums and things, but I don't know who I would pick to be a hero. I think everyone should be their own heroes and things. Just to be who you are, and live life. -Harvest

Talking About Adventures

So today was one of those rare days where I had the balls to communicate with my Owner about how I want our relationship to go a little bit. First we talked about the review job that I've been doing online. I am excited to say that he actually wanted to try having some fun with this stuff! He says he had some past girlfriends who weren't as adventurous as I am, and that he would be glad to do it. He said he has some experience with doing some of the things before, so I will get to see how he works. :3 We discussed our BDSM relationship a bit and when I asked him how he felt about being my Owner, he stated that he would like to improve if I would help him. This made me so happy! We are going to go over some of the basic stuff tonight of what we want to do and what we don't want to do in our relationship (needs, wants, various limits, and such). Since we are in a position where we can't really do much of the kinkier stuff, we are going to start with some of the more

SJP-- Flowers

"We all know that roses are a common symbol for love. What flower do you think describes your submission? Why?" I jokingly would say that a flower or plant that represented my submission would be poison ivy. Clingy and very itchy (wait, what?). Clingy because I have a tendency to sort of co-mingle with the person that I am with in a way that could become irritating to them, but is beneficial because I can protect us both. I don't feel right if I can't protect the both of us. I want my Top to be happy. I am glad that I have my Owner, who puts up with my crap every day and puts me in my place. Itchy because... well, it's sort of a metaphor for being irritating. I can become very irritating to people I am close to, because of how much I cling to them. I'm not going to lie (I try not to anyway, but you get the point), but I think I have a dependency issue. Now, if I was to suggest a real flower that represented my submission, I would think of it as a sort

30 Days of Truth-- Day 13

A letter to a band or something that has helped you persevere: Well, I have a lot of different musicians who have helped me through some rough times. Let me think. To all the musicians out there:  Thank you for your booty-shaking beats that have kept me sane. I could not live without my music. I am appreciative of all that you do. As I have misophonia, most sounds are irritating or even painful to me, but music is one of those things that is not. I am so happy that I can put on my headphones and go about my day, even if I look like some kind of douchebag with headphones on everywhere I go. This is still much better than when I used to wear earplugs every time I went somewhere. I wish I could take the music with me more places, such as restaurants. If I could take your music into restaurants then I would be even happier, but I know that this is a rude gesture and should not be done. I especially want to thank Daft Punk and the Rasmus for their musical contributions to my colle

30 Days of Truth-- Day 12

Something you never get compliments on: Oh goodness. I  don't get compliments on a lot of things. My waist size being one of them. Which is why I'm working out more lately. I want to be able to top or bottom and be in good condition. I want to be able to do a lot of things and be in good condition. I'm learning how to do the splits slowly. I think I can do it, but I'm worried that my legs are the kind that are not predisposed to being able to do this. I don't know why I want to do it. I think I just want to prove to myself that it can be done. I stretch out as much as I can each day and see what I can do. I think I have seen improvement. I'm working with handweights now. Small ones, so nothing too strenuous. I have fibromyalgia and things so I have to be careful not to aggrivate it. :3 -Harvest

SJP-- Freedom

“How blessed am I in this discovering thee To enter in these bonds is to be free.” – John Donne This was the quote from the Submissive Journal Prompts that I took to do today. I want to say that I have never felt any better than I do now. I have tried my hardest to be the best pet that I can for my Owner. I feel like the further into submissiveness that I venture, the safer and happier I feel. I am in a whole new world, and I love it. So I ask you: Are we free in our submission? I personally feel free. I feel like I can do anything (within reason of course, but why do I want to do anything but what would not please my Owner?) that I want to do. My structure helps me be free. My play time helps me be free, as well. In this I am free. What are your thoughts? -harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 11

Something people compliment you on, often: I get comments about my chest and my pink hair often. People really like my pink hair, and I guess my chest is something to look at. I dunno. I have had people compliment my eyes as well. They're a kind of hazel-y, gold color very similar to a cat's eye color. In some lighting they even look green or brown. I like the fact that my eyes are so cool. It's something that I am proud of. :3 -harvest

To the Club!

Last night was my very first time in a club. I. Had. A. BLAST. I just wanted to share that. I put on my sexiest undergarments that I have, my pleather skirt (which was a bit hot, btw), a nice lacy tank top, and my collar. I was PROUD to be wearing my collar out again, with my Owner having put it on me prior to leaving. (I'm thinking of getting a nice day collar for my birthday next month, so if you have a shop that sells good collars I am interested!!) My Owner did not come to the club with me, as I had been in a meeting beforehand that he was not allowed to go to. That meeting was so helpful, and I am glad I got to go with my bestie. She's super cool. So now I'm writing up a training resume of my own, which I will post on here after I have finished it so you all can see what sort of things I'm capable of doing, and what I want to do, etc. I am glad to have the chance to do such a thing. I've been talking to my Owner about doing more mental dominance th

30 Days of Truth-- Day 10

Someone you wish you didn't know or wish you could let go: Wow. This seems pretty cold to me. I don't think I could ever just forcefully let go of someone. I don't think there's a single person I know that I don't want to know. I would feel so awful for just leaving them out in the cold like that. I'm not a bad person. I'm just misunderstood. -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 9

Someone you didn't want to let go, but just drifted... I miss my old friend, Moose. I miss being able to talk to her and things. I really wanted to see her kid more, but she just isn't interested in talking to me anymore or anything. I wanted to hang out with her and things when I could get the chance. I don't drive though, so it is kind of hard for me to get around. My Owner drives me when I need to go places. We always go places together. Sometimes, I go with my friends instead. I don't think I have anyone else that I've drifted apart from, though. I see my old friends and usually am pretty sure that I don't want to be around them for some good reason. They usually remind me why that is within an instant or two. I love all of my friends though, even if we're not friends anymore. -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 8

Someone who's made your life hell... I really don't want to talk about this. I think I'll skip this day. I honestly can't talk about this because it feels like gossiping and I really don't want to be a gossip. Please respect my choice. -Harvest

Degradation

So this came up on FetLife in one of the kitten groups that I am a member of. We were asked if our Owners were into degrading us and things like that. I want to say now that my Owner is not into degradation, and neither am I. I am a cat, and I should be respected. Think of it like old Egypt or something. Hee hee. No, I wouldn't be that way. I do enjoy being the Top sometimes, and that is what it feels like ("I am like Bastet, hear me meow"), but for the most part I just enjoy a form of mutual respect. I respect my Owner, and He respects me. This doesn't mean that I am not submissive in my ways.I am very submissive. I will do whatever He asks (within reason, and He knows it), but isn't that a form of respect as well? Just as He takes care of me, I take care of Him. So don't just automatically assume that all Pet Play relationships are degrading. Some are, some are not. Mine is not, as previously stated. Maybe we're just different. -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 7

Someone who has made your life worth living: I would definitely, 100% tell you that the person who has made my life worth living is my Owner, Batsz. It started out where all my friends thought he was really creepy and things. I was told not to date him, but something in the back of my mind told me that I was on the right path. I loved this man. I worshiped this man. I wanted him to be mine forever. Now we are in a Owner/pet relationship on top of our regular relationship. And that's great with me. He allows me to play and things, and I encourage him to do whatever he wants. We are monogamous, and it feels absolutely right. Right now, I am typing this as he sleeps. I do not wish to wake him, I feel like I should let him sleep, because he rarely does anyway. I love my Owner with all my heart and pledge my loyalty to him. -Harvest <3's Batsz

30 Days of Truth- Day 6

Something you hope you never have to do: I guess that would be the things that comprise my Hard Limits list, like watersports and scatplay. Even though I am into Kitten Play, I do not want to be litter box trained either. I'm perfectly fine using a toilet, thankyouverymuch. I'm not saying that watersports or scatplay are something I look down on, but I do find them to be rather unhealthy, although... I have heard urine is very sterile? But I don't understand how that could be as it is considered waste either way. I know people who are into these things and it sort of confuses me. I wonder how you discover that you are into such a thing? I will have to do some research. -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 5

Something you'd like to do in your life? Well, I would like a better chance to Top someone. I want to make up for the really poor job I seem to feel like I did with the other sub that I like to talk to and things. But I don't think it's ever going to happen. I think that my Owner would be too strict on this kind of thing. I also want to try being a better sub, too. I feel like I haven't really had a decent go about it or anything. I dunno. I want my Owner to flog me a bit. Not too hard, because I'm just not that good at it yet.... But still. It would be fun. Kitty, kitty loves to play wants to be flogged another day kitty, kitty loves her Owner blah blahditty blah ... boner. That was my best poem, yet! -Harvest

30 Days of Truth-- Day 4

Something to forgive someone for? Oh god. That list is long. I hold grudges for the longest time. I wish I didn't. That's something else that I hate about myself. I don't think I'm ready to forgive anyone for anything yet, the wounds are all still fresh to me, even if they are still a few years old. I think I may never forgive that person, even though I have had people ask me to. But that seems a bit insensitive to me... To not understand my side of things. I may never forgive that person. My life is a wreck a lot of the time because of it. I don't know. It all seems so fresh. -Harvest.

Tornadoes

For those of you who happen to know that I live in Oklahoma (if you didn't, you do now), I wanted to express that both my Owner and I are safe. His car got mangled a bit from the tennis ball sized hail, but it is still possibly drivable. We are going to go to our other home (we live in two) and check for damage there and hope that everything is okay. My parents are okay, as well as my brother; I talked to them last night online when the power stopped flashing so much. I am sending positive thoughts out to all of those people who suffered in the horrible tornadoes that have plagued Oklahoma for the past month, as I have with all the people who I have sent out positive thoughts for in the past. I am incapable of doing anything to help others at the moment, and it feels like a complete shame. I wish I could be there helping out, but I know that we have our own troubles to deal with currently, as with the chance that the car might be totaled. If you are reading this, please send

30 Days of Truth- Day 3

Something I have to forgive myself for? I'm not sure. I don't really have anything that I've held against myself or anything. I just kind of go with flow and enjoy life. "No regrets" I suppose. I suppose if I really thought about it I would forgive myself for treating myself like crap. I feel like I haven't really taken care of myself in a proper manner over the years, but I'm trying now, not just for myself but for my Owner. I want us both to see that I can shine. So I forgive you self. I don't hold it against you. -Harvest